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Lost style: Wilderness Guy

by Jonathon Morgan (Subscribe to Jonathon Morgan's posts)
Posted Feb 6th 2008 at 8:33PM  
1 Comment
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Especially if you're into dating women who wear Sierra Club t-shirts and read Margaret Atwood novels, it's important that you understand the subtle yet refined art of the Wilderness Guy. But be careful, you vision-seeing, knife-throwing, boar-hunting John Locke wannabe -- too rugged, and you'll look homeless, but just enough sweat on your t-shirt and mud on your hands and you can pretend to have a special connection with the spirit of the island.

However, in this case, the clothes don't quite make the man. You'll need to cultivate an expression that simultaneously intrigues, and scares the crap out of everyone around you -- something that says "I might be in touch with a higher plane of existence, or maybe I want to eat you!" Sure, it'll make your friends uncomfortable at first, but the Wilderness Guy's main competition (when not trapped in mysterious island scenarios) are dudes who spend weeks trekking through the mountains without human contact -- so it's not like you're dealing with the most socially adept people on the planet.

Keys to getting the John Locke look at home:
  • Shave your head
  • Get yourself some wilderness gear
  • Find yourself a weapon

Pick your favorite Lostie


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READER COMMENTS

(1)Add A Comment

Briane, 2-08-2008, 5:22PM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Briane

Um, where are the ladies?

Reply »

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