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Snobby Accessory of the Moment - The Perfect Tan

by Jessica B. Matlin (Subscribe to Jessica B. Matlin's posts)
Posted May 5th 2009 at 2:45PM  
2 Comments
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Fashion people are funny. They have their own little discreet visual code that, to the keen observer, speaks volumes about their refined taste and lifestyle. The unscratched red sole of a Louboutin, the intrecciato stitching of a Bottega Veneta handbag, and most recently, The Perfectly Nuanced Tan.

At last night's Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art, a disproportionate amount of attendees were working a shade of Beautiful People Bronze that whispered, "I'm not one of you." (Just in case you needed any reminding.)

The tan was rich and beautifully three-dimensional, despite occasionally veering into orange-y terrain. No matter what the hue was, the color was so carefully modulated, I imagine it was manually applied by a small army of doting spa technicians, all with advanced degrees in self-tanner application.

Of course, I could be wrong. Maybe some women were foolishly working authentic, sun-baked tans. But the implication is still the same: They're pampered, you're not. While they've been luxuriating on a beach, the rest of us plebes have been under tacky fluorescent lights, caught in the glare of our computer screens eating Subway sandwiches or something.

Sad, I know. But for escapism's sake, let's take a look at the best of the spectrum.

http://xml.channel.aol.com/xmlpublisher/fetch.v2.xml?option=expand_relative_urls&dataUrlNodes=uiConfig,feedConfig,entry&id=585584&pid=585583&uts=1261069310
http://cdn.channel.aol.com/cs_feed_v1_6/csfeedwrapper.swf
The Bronzed & The Beautiful
See who fake baked for last night's Costume Institute Gala.
Stephen Lovekin, Getty Images
Phil Walter, Getty Images

The Bronzed & The Beautiful

    Jessica Biel
    Lady in red, vision in chiaroscuro. J. Biel's tan so greatly emphasized her crazy-sculpted body and angular facial structure, I thought one of the Met employees might accidentally cart her off to The New Greek and Roman Galleries.

    Stephen Lovekin, Getty Images

    Kate Moss
    Clearly, nothing goes better with gold mini-toga than a bronze bod. Loving the homage to antiquity.

    Randy Brooke, WireImage

    Blake Lively
    Girl loves to show off her (frankly amazing) cleavage so often, it's becoming a bit cliché. But I guess if I had a perfect body the color of Carribean wet sand, I'd flaunt as much of as I could get away with, too.

    Stephen Lovekin, Getty Images

    Molly Sims
    I don't think I've ever seen Sims this tan - even during her Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue days.

    Larry Busacca, Getty Images

    Victoria Beckham
    The Original. Posh worked that orange bod and those contoured cheekbones like it was her last spin on the red carpet eh-vah.

    Stephen Lovekin, Getty Images

    Cindy Crawford
    Okay, not sure if her tan was one of the best, but it was certainly the most well-done. (Pun fully intended.) Lady out-tanned Donatella and stepped on her dress. (Honestly, I thought she was Eva Mendes' older sister at first glance.)

    Stephen Lovekin, Getty Images






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Filed under: Beauty, Celebrity, Makeup, Red Carpet
Tags: costume institute gala, CostumeInstituteGala, self-tanning, tanning
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Related Videos

by 5min
  • How the Magic Tan Sun Tanning Device Works How the Magic Tan Sun Tanning Device Works Play Get that sun kissed look without having to bake in the sun with the Magic Tan.
  • 4 Softening Scrubs for Body Skin 4 Softening Scrubs for Body Skin Play While facial exfoliating is quite common, body scrubbing is often overlooked. During the cold weather months, however, scrubs can be a girl's best friend, working to remove flakes and salvaging dry, parched skin. They also moisturize and condition the body for a glistening, beach-ready body when it's a lot hotter outside. Here are four we love to slather on - one is even safe to apply pre-airbrush tan.
  • The Tanning Effect - Gwyneth Paltrow (Part Two) The Tanning Effect - Gwyneth Paltrow (Part Two) Play Academy Award winning actress Gwenyth Paltrow talks about growing up in Santa Monica, California, interracial relationships, performing Jay-Z's "Song Cry" on her birthday in London, her love for NWA and the Beastie Boys, performing with Cee Lo Green, the shift of beauty in America.
  • The Tanning Effect - Gwyneth Paltrow (Part Three) The Tanning Effect - Gwyneth Paltrow (Part Three) Play Academy Award winning actress Gwenyth Paltrow talks about growing up in Santa Monica, California, interracial relationships, performing Jay-Z's "Song Cry" on her birthday in London, her love for NWA and the Beastie Boys, performing with Cee Lo Green, the shift of beauty in America.

READER COMMENTS

(2)Add A Comment

Joe Bob Richie, 5-05-2009, 6:34PM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Joe Bob Richie

Looking at Jessica Simpson's tan caused me to wonder, hmm...could this be Alice Cooper's long lost granddaughter

Reply »

cootabrown, 5-05-2009, 10:03PM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
cootabrown

This goes out to the celebrity lips volume lip wearing woman !I'm using plump lips and it works for me so why are you trying to get $99.00 out of my credit card it's just not happening , beside I think my lips are just fine they do just fine on my husband after all every time I make love to him I don't hear him complaining I'm hearing just the opposite and it sounds good to me . . .

Reply »

 
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