Some highlights of the he said/she said feature: Pattinson spends more time than Stewart on his hair and is more romantic, the two disagree on who's more egotistical, Pattinson is the better musician. ("He's a great singer. Heartbreaking," says Stewart.) And they both agree that Stewart is the more athletic of the two.
"Rob can barely jump rope," Stewart tells Bazaar. "I call him Flippy because when he does his stunt rehearsals, he flips around [makes a gesture like a penguin]. And, God, when he tries to run ..."
Pattinson, for his part, doesn't deny it.
The interview took place in Vancouver, while the on-screen/off-screen lovebirds were filming "Eclipse," the third installment of the "Twilight" saga. (Sidenote: Their hotel rooms are side by side.)
Shot by Mark Seliger, the Bazaar photo shoot finds the two stars dressed in predominantly black, white and grey, with an appropriate streak of deep blood red.
"You notice it in the film; she looks so much more athletic than I do," he admits. "And I'm supposed to be the superhero."
Pattinson works a minimal and lean look in lots of Dior Homme, while Stewart is sultry in slinky black dresses by Gucci, Alexander Wang and Versace, in addition to an Alexander McQueen voluminous black ballgown fit for a vampire bride.
Whiling sitting for the interview, Stewart's clothing choices are predictably much more casual -- jeans, layered white and tie-dyed tank tops -- though, not a la Britney Spears.
"I'm like, f**k, I'm not wearing a neon-colored tube top or something pink," says Stewart in one of her many potty mouth moments.
When the actress is not in jeans and a tee, she says she dreams of owning a custom Brooks Brothers suit, and fesses up to a (totally understandable) love of Chanel. But everything must have a little edge, like the metal-studded Rock & Republic miniskirt she donned at the Teen Choice Awards.
"Everyone was like, 'Look at your spiky skirt!' And I was like, 'Spiky skirt? They were bullets, mofo!,'" she says, going on to explain that her hard edge is not an act. "People think I'm trying to be rebellious, but that's the last thing I'm doing."
She's just being herself, which Pattinson -- and millions of fans -- clearly has no problem with.
"She's a unique girl," he tells Bazaar. "You really don't meet many people like Kristen." Awwwww.
Visit HarpersBazaar.com to read the entire interview and see all the photos from the sexy shoot.
HAve you been bitten by the vampire craze? You'd be surprised to see how far some people have gone.