Mens Fashion Week

The recent menswear shows in Paris and Milan may have had plenty of dreamy male models to drool over, but they also had a slew of bizarre ensembles that triggered our gag reflex, not our salivatory glands. Behold, the most motley of the crew.

Take one part Milli Vanilli, one part American Gladiator, and one part Ronald McDonald and you've got this frankly frightening Spandex creation from John Galliano's Paris show.

Mens Fashion Week

For his A/W 2010 show in Milan, Alexander McQueen ditched the armadillo heels in favor of mottled paisley suits and mouth-blocking ski masks. Beats walking in those heels.

Mens Fashion Week

We'll take him -- he's perfect. Tighty whities made a "brief" appearance at the Alexis Mabille show in Paris.

Mens Fashion Week

C3PO sure has changed. This flashy metallic look hit the Milan runway at Les Hommes.

Mens Fashion Week

Homeless "chic" took center stage at Vivienne Westwood's Milan show, where the season's must-have accessories were plastic bags and shopping carts. Way to keep it real, Viv.

Mens Fashion Week

Hmmm. So this Romain Kremer creation for A/W 2010 keeps a guy's mouth under wraps while his six-pack abs and pecs are on full display? Actually, that's not crazy -- that's genius.

Mens Fashion Week

Tokio Hotel rocker/Sonic the Hedgehog impersonator Bill Kaulitz took part in Dsquared2's Milan show, though we wouldn't be surprised if homeboy just brought that jet-black feathered cape from his closet at home.

Mens Fashion Week

Houston, we have a problem. Models at Belgium designer Walter Van Beirendonck's Paris A/W 2010 show sported oversized headphones, hats and side-splitting weapons. And don't get us started on the Crayola-hued turtlenecks.

Mens Fashion Week

Just what we need: A man in the MC Hammer pants equivalent of a onesie, as seen at Damir Doma's A/W 2010 Paris show.

Mens Fashion Week

Raf Simons' Paris show gave us fellas in feminine A-line skirts (oooo-kay) and this gender-bending suit, which we like to call "James Bond, a Bond Girl and a Really Bad Case of Static Cling."

Mens Fashion Week