New Jersey, the state that has proven that big hair and big bosoms bring big ratings, is the location of yet another distinctively "stylish" reality TV show.
"Jerseylicious," a docudrama set in the lavishly renovated Gatsby Salon, introduces us to a new cast of Garden Staters with a fondness for smoky eyes, pumped up hair, animal prints, petty rivalries and way too much bronzer. Sound familiar?
The only difference: This crew has ditched the sweats and Ed Hardy hats in favor of cleavage-baring dresses and Manolo Blahniks.
Debuting tonight on the Style Network, the show follows the return of "Kimora, Life in the Fab Lane."
Unlike their sure-to-be rivals on MTV's wildly popular "Jersey Shore," the "Jerseylicious" ladies can claim their cosmetology licenses (that's assuming they really do have them).
However, we were relieved to learn from the network that part of the "drama" this season centers around mother and daughter owners -- Gayle and Christy -- worrying that their creative team may read "too Jersey" for the upscale clientele. There will no doubt be a, um, "Situation" in that arena.
StyleList got an advanced viewing of an upcoming one-hour episode prior to tonight's series debut, and while the show's drama seems a bit scripted, it's too bad that "Jersey Shore" beat this show to the poofy hair punch.
"Jerseylicious" is kind of a cross between "Tabatha's Salon Takeover" and the mindless fist-pumping drama down the shore.
While the network is hyping the rivalry between ambitious new hair stylist Tracy and Snooki-like makeup artist Olivia (Tracy is dating Olivia's ex-boyfriend, after all), we're more intrigued by Alexa, the "The Glam Fairy," who bills herself as one of the "top makeup artists" in the Tri-State Area. (No comment.)
Her metallic eyeshadow and frosted lips have us worried for her so-called "celebrity" clients. Alexa also delivered the line of the night on the episode we watched: "Just because you own four pots of MAC eyeshadow doesn't make you a makeup artist." That's the (MAC) pot calling the kettle black.
And then there's Gigi, whose two life goals are "cutting hair and getting married"... Soon! Only problem is her give-us-the-creeps boyfriend is the hot-headed jealous type. We're hoping Gigi snips him out of the picture, stat.
If we can stomach another Jersey moment we might just tune in for an upcoming "training" visit to New York City's Warren Tricomi Salon, where real celebrity hair stylist Edward Tricomi is seen ripping the Gatsby stylists' appearances to shreds, including ordering them to trim their too-long nails.
"Jerseylicious" premieres tonight on the StyleNetwork at 10/9 C.
And if that isn't enough Jersey for you, don't forget that the Oxygen network is developing "Jersey Couture," about a Garden State dress shop.
Kind of makes us want to head a few exits south to Delaware.