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Constance McMillen Gets Second Chance Prom

by Marissa Gold (Subscribe to Marissa Gold's posts)
Posted Apr 30th 2010 at 11:45AM  
43 Comments
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Constance McMillan at the GLAAD Media Awards. Photo: Michael Caulfield/WireImage.com

The story of Constance McMillen and her ill-fated high school prom shocked us.

When parents and school administrators found out that McMillen, a lesbian, wanted to wear a tuxedo and bring her girlfriend to prom, someone went as far as to plan a decoy prom for McMillen (as well as some of the school's special needs students) while the rest of the student body gathered at a secret "real" prom.

It's hard to imagine that a school -- or parents -- would go so far, all because of two girls who want to attend prom together. Or was it the tuxedo?

Itawamba Agricultural High School has banned a few items from its dress code, including trench coats. But we didn't see anything about tuxedos being inappropriate at proms. Nor did we see anything about students not being free to bring the date of their choice to prom.

The school's own website states, "It is believed by the school that parents/legal guardians should recognize that the main purpose of public education is to provide an education for students that will allow them to become useful citizens in a global society." Surely those parents must realize that our global society includes people of other sexual orientations.

Regardless of whether the school and its community have realized any wrongdoing, millions of outraged Americans have come to McMillen's defense, including Lance Bass (a Mississippi native), Green Day, the American Humanist Association, the American Civil Liberties Union, and Cat Cora.

Thanks to donations from many of those people and groups, as well as people like you, a new prom will take place in Tupelo, Mississippi on May 8, 2010.

They're calling it a "Second Chance" prom, and all of the students at Itawamba are invited. "It was important to us that the students at IAHS receive an invitation to our prom. All students are welcomed," says Matthew Sheffield, Communications Director of the Mississippi Safe Schools Coalition.

And as for that tuxedo... no one in the fashion circuit seems to think it's a faux pas. Anya Sarre, head stylist for "Entertainment Tonight" and "The Insider" suggests, "a modern, fashion-forward version of a tuxedo" for McMillen to wear on the big night. Sarre points out that Zac Posen for Target makes a stylish tuxedo jacket, and recommends McMillen pair the black and white look with "some fun spring-colored shoes like turquoise or hot pink." After all, gay, straight, male, or female, everyone at prom wants to look great and have a night to remember.

With musical guest Hey Champ, celebrity DJ Quest Love, and additional star appearances promised, it's likely to be the biggest party Itawamba high school kids have ever seen. Not to mention that the night is all about second chances. So the question remains -- will any of McMillen's classmates attend?

More prom stories:
Teen makes prom dress out of gum wrappers
New prom dresses are showing a lot of skin
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Filed under: Celebrity, News
Tags: constance micmillen, ConstanceMicmillen, itawamba agricultural high school, itawamba high school, itawamba missouri, ItawambaAgriculturalHighSchool, ItawambaHighSchool, ItawambaMissouri, prom, second chance prom, SecondChanceProm
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READER COMMENTS

(43)Add A Comment

Suzie, 5-02-2010, 3:02PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
Suzie

To Joe Willie: You aren't too bright to think that the gay community is always looking for handouts. I am a straight lady and I see far more straight people looking for handouts, than that of those that are not. Many, many gay people are very well respected, very successful in life and my bet....many are more so than yourself. This girl is a part of the school, as well as those that were disabled in some form. They should be allowed to go to a school function as much as any other student. Shame on You....and shame on the school system.

Reply »

Shawnsmyname18, 5-02-2010, 3:07PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
Shawnsmyname18

Good job!

Our country needs to let go of their old morals and begin to open their eyes to a newer generation. This is 2010. What gives anyone the right to dictate the lives of others? By doing this it makes you no better than Adolf Hitler. The constitution protects a person's Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. Why can't we let people be themselves?

Stop telling people it's immoral. Yes it may be immoral to you but it may not be to another. Let someone enjoy their lives without fear of discrimination. How would you have liked it if your prom did not allow White people or people under 5 foot 11. Alot of people would not be allowed to attend over stupid reasons.

Everyone deserves the right to be happy. Enough said.

Reply »

Jeff, 5-02-2010, 3:37PM

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Jeff

The constitution says that we have right to pursue happiness, nothing about deserving it. We don't "deserve" anything. We have to earn it and that does not mean special consideration for a lifestyle that is at odds with the norm.

»

flames, 5-04-2010, 3:03AM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
flames

you know..thats the problem with society...they have to get into other peoples business..my daughter is gay..she went to her gf's high school prom with her the other night... she even wore a tux..she looked beautiful..along with her beautiful girlfriend...and you know.. she came home upset.. and now i am wondering if someone said something "rude" to her!! why can't kids just be kids and enjoy a good time. prom is suppose to be about "memories".. damn.. its just to bad life isn't like it used to be when i was in high school... people really need to grow up and quit putting they nose in other people's business!!!!

»

Good for her, 5-02-2010, 3:12PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
Good for her

I'm so glad that somebody who can do something about this stupid, close-minded injustice actually is. Prom is for EVERY student, not just the "normal" ones. Just because someone (in this case Constance) doesn't fit into her community's idea of what is regular, doesn't give them a right to oust her from a community event. She lives there, she isn't hurting a soul, and she has just as much of a right to live their as they do. It makes me happy that at least someone gives enough of a hoot about this situation to give this girl, and anyone else who wants it, a second chance at living life with the same opportunities as her peers.

Reply »

Tolerant... or not., 8-23-2010, 7:35AM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Tolerant... or not.

Ok, so there is a man with a gun in a holster walking around inside the Wal-Mart but not making any threats to people with the weapon. This is somehow acceptable because he has the right to carry a gun? How is this any different than a person who chooses to attend a function proclaiming their sexual preference even though they are not trying to influence others at the same fuction?

Okay so she was not trying to convert every other student into becoming a lesbian, but at the same time, the influence she would have for those in attendance would be almost as uncomfortable as the fellow in Wal-Mart. It is not as much an issue of her preference or lifestyle, as it is how others feel about her demonstrative nature while at the prom.

I have always found it interesting that some people demand acceptance because they dont want their feelings hurt or because they may be uncomfortable in the situation, while at the same time, there is a lack of consideration about those whom these people demand acceptance from also having hurt feelings and might be uncomfortable. The double standard is a majority of the problem I see here.

I believe the courts made an error with this in as much as they should allowed her and her girlfriend to attend albeit both in a dress, to conform to the expected clothing standards. The ruling for the Caraday case is that religious garb is acceptable for special events as well as day to day activities as long as it does not interfere with the function or the rights of others.

When people are so self absorbed to believe they are somehow owed the right to believe or profess a position, and do so without regard to others, then someone will get their feelings hurt. Sometimes, the hurt is enough to warrant a lawsuit.

Males are expected to be in a tux while females are expected to be in a dress when attending an event such as a prom. Ms. McMillan has the right to attend any school function as a student. She also has a right to share with others what her sexual preference is, at her option. What she does not have is the right to impose her beliefs on others or demand they agree with her position. Had she attended her prom in a dress, and had her girlfriend attend in a dress too, NO ONE would have complained. It is a give and take situation rather then "My way is the right way" position both sides took.

As for the morality of the relationship, I agree that the bible does not support such a relationship. The bible also does not condone judging someone for their actions or beliefs. That is up to God not me. I dont have to like it, but I should accept it and try to convey by deed, that there is another alternative. Our society had become too self indlugent to see that we are too self indulgent. We will continue to hurt ourselves unless/until we grow up and look at how we can accomodate others rather than continue with the "Me me me" mentality.

»

John, 5-02-2010, 5:25PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
John

This is going to be the coolest prom EVER and you can tell by all the moronic,nasty,hateful jerk comments that its opponents are JEALOUS as hell!!! Leave it to the gay community to pull together yet another "IT" event that the 'normal' bores couldn't pull off in a million years (and still invite EVERYONE)! Congrats kids! It's gonna rock and anyone who DOESN'T Attend will suddenly become the NOBODIES that they really are!!!

Reply »

Just a guy, 5-02-2010, 4:11PM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Just a guy

Another shining moment from the So So Educated Christian Loving Bible Thumping Racists Homo phobics and Hypocrites of the South.
If they only knew how many of their right wing christian coalition republican neighbors were secretly in the closet. How many parents from that school have no idea that their own son or daughter is struggling right now with their own sexuality.
For the time it took to plan a DECOY prom they could have had a school awareness seminar to let the closed minded citizens of Itawamba come to grips that it's 2010 and you are now the MINORITY. The rest of the country has slowly over time adopted the philosophy that people are not all from the same cookie cutter molds that you so desperately and ignorantly cling too. What is even MORE hypocritical is all of those same students who SO STRONGLY OPPOSED the lesbians at their prom will be the FIRST in line to the second chance prom. Mississippi....way to keep perpetuating that tired old myth that y'all are a bunch of ignorant trailer park trash.

Reply »

monkeyjerky2, 5-02-2010, 4:09PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
monkeyjerky2

Ah..Let me guess. You're one of those people that thinks homosexuality is a choice, am I right? Okay, let me dumb this down for ya because you're obviously a backwater idiot. No they haven't definitively proved that it's not a choice or that it's caused by a so called "gay gene". But you gotta think about it. With all the people that get assaulted and sometimes killed just for being gay. Don't you think that if they were able to choose whether or not they were gay, they'd choose to be straight, just to avoid all that?

Reply »

exoticdoc2, 5-04-2010, 10:41AM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
exoticdoc2

Monkeyjerk, I guess the name says it all. Homosexuality is a choice at least in part. Even if there is some genetic component predisposing one to such immoral behavior, which is doubtful, it does not excuse CHOOSING to act on the behaviors. Shall we excuse the murderer or rapist because genetically he has more testosterone in his system? Pedophiles are also starting to use the homosexual excuse, shall we then excuse their behavior because they claim they are genetically programmed to lust after children? Of course not, sick and twisted is sick and twisted, and there is no excusing it by crying to genetics. People CHOOSE to act on their impulses, no question.

»

exoticdoc2, 5-04-2010, 4:12PM

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exoticdoc2

The other thing to consider is how you decide homosexuality (or anything) is right or wrong. From whence do you derive your morality? Until you have a valid answer for that your opinion is meaningless.

»

monkeyjerky2, 5-04-2010, 5:30PM

2.5 stars vote downvote upReport
monkeyjerky2

Even if you're right about it being a choice. Why do you care so much? Are they hurting you? Are they coming onto you? I for the most part don't care if people are gay, so long as they're not overly flamboyant about it. And your gonna sit there and compare homosexuality to rapists and murder's? And even if people are killers genetically that's a much bigger step than with homosexuality, the only people that hurts are the people that are too close minded to accept others for their beliefs and choices. Honestly I think what people do behind closed doors shouldn't matter unless it's mentally or physically harming someone. And about your question of morals. Let me guess are you a "church going folk". If so go ahead and grab your bible so you can shield yourself. I don't go to church. I don't believe in any of that Christianity nonsense. Does that mean I don't have morals? No it doesn't, my morals come from a gut feeling that if something feels wrong or doesn't seem very good. Then I'm generally right about that. And you can say whatever the hell you want about me not having morals by some kind of rediculous standards but whatever Doc, get off the computer and go save a life.

»

Jack, 5-02-2010, 4:17PM

Half a star vote downvote upReport
Jack

The story start that this shocked all of us. I am sorry it did not shock me. It again was one of those many things that happen in life but because she went out in the world spreading her problem that all of these came up with thing to keep her happy. Sorry that is not the way that life is suppose to be. We make our choise and if we don't get out way we don't expect the whole world to give it to us.
She played the game and won this time, but what will happen the next time she is told no she can't do that?

Reply »

exoticdoc2, 5-03-2010, 8:58PM

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exoticdoc2

By the way, for those interested, if you sometimes post comments on Pop Eater, they will censor what you say, and not just for vulgarities. If the comment is not PC enough and disagrees with what they think, they will not post it. I found it ironic in that the place I tested this idea was on the article on Muslim censorship, via threats of violence (surprise, surprise), of South Park. So just be aware that Pop Eater is into censorship big time. I have been repeatedly testing the popeater comments section and they also censor any negative comments about themselves, such as this. Apparently they are ashamed of what they are doing and trying to hide it.

Reply »

Linda, 5-04-2010, 9:09AM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Linda

obviously, they are not printing what I sent this evening either...AND this has happened numerous times before.

»

Barbara, 5-03-2010, 9:16PM

3 stars vote downvote upReport
Barbara

Discrimination still alive and well in the 21st century. My 18 year old son said to me just today that in 30 years all the racists and bigots will hopefully be dead and we can all coexist (he's dreaming, they are raising more....but I digress). He is straight, btw, as I am.

And exoticdoc2 - BIG difference between gays and pedophiles, murderers, etc. I do not believe that most gays choose their sexuality. You say that: quote:

"Likewise, pedophiles are now adopting the homosexual excuse. Are they to be given a pass because they are predisposed to lusting after children? " along with rapists and murderers....

Um....gays "acting on their impulse" are not harming anyone. Pedophiles are. What a stupid comment.

Reply »

revivalman, 5-03-2010, 9:22PM

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revivalman

I love it when ignorant people are TOO dumb to spell correctly and then display their stupidity for the whole world to see. Way to go, Willy!!

Reply »

Matt, 5-03-2010, 9:56PM

Half a star vote downvote upReport
Matt

It's not the kids's fault in this case, its the adults. The apple does not fall far from the tree people. But I am glad she is getting a second chance. I am sure the rest of the students don't care what her sexuality is. They just want to have a blast now.

Reply »

Linda, 5-04-2010, 9:11AM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
Linda

You are only hurting yourself. You disobey God's word and follow these activist groups that tell you it's okay to be gay....well it is not and some day you will realize that and because your name has been so splattered all over the internet now, no straight guy will ever want you......What a shame.

Reply »

ickyickyicky999, 5-03-2010, 10:21PM

2 stars vote downvote upReport
ickyickyicky999

exoticdoc2 - You're an idiot with the IQ of a soap dish.

Cooper - Religeon and a person's sexual orientation are quite different. Ghandi put it perfectly when he said, "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." You're the perfect example of this quote. And by the way, you will never have to worry about your "brain falling out", your thick skull won't allow for that almond sized gem to be harmed.

Reply »

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